Seven surprises about breastfeeding an older baby


I feel privileged to be breasteeding my ten-month-old. It shouldn't be a surprise as it was for the health visitor who visited us a couple of weeks ago. After all breastfeeding, particularly if your baby is under a year, is nothing if not normal. Read more

Wearing an older baby: woven wrap vs soft structured carrier


While I know people who've worn their babies in stretchy wraps all the way into toddlerhood, I packed mine in when Talitha hit six months. Her weight by then made the fabric uncomfortably bunch up around my shoulders and the more mobile she became Read more

The breastfeeding father


I've just had my first Mother's Day and, funnily enough, it's made me think about fathers. Laurence Talitha bought me La Leche League membership. The LLL is an international charity for breastfeeding mothers and I've just begun going to its Bristol branch meetings. The Read more

Don't label my parenting: struggling with "attachment parenting"


I've recently become uncomfortable with the term "attachment parenting". It's tricky because it very much describes what we're trying to do. Though we do have a routine, we watch our baby and not the clock. We refuse to rush her independence. We respond to Read more

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Breastfeeding

Seven surprises about breastfeeding an older baby

Posted on April 17, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 34 Comments

I feel privileged to be breasteeding my ten-month-old. It shouldn’t be a surprise as it was for the health visitor who visited us a couple of weeks ago. After all breastfeeding, particularly if your baby is under a year, is nothing if not normal.

But for me it is a surprise. A delightful one. With a tongue-tie and low milk supply, I was pretty sure our breastfeeding journey was near its end over six months ago. I’m glad we were able to keep going. These are some of the things I would have missed out on otherwise.

1. The distraction
It doesn’t matter how tired or hungry Talitha is. If there’s another sound in the room, that’s more interesting than my breast. Two sucks and she’s off. I’ve become skilled at speedily covering up. As if by reflex, she turns to feed again as soon as the nipple’s out of view. I love seeing how interested she is in the world.

I’m not even embarrassed anymore. It only irks me because I want to make sure she’s not hungry or tired.

It’s got to a point where I either have to go into a separate room to feed her or I just don’t bother to offer when out.

She fights her way out of a sling unless we’re walking. It turns out that’s the only way I can feed her when out – by walking. Bizarre.

All the more reason to cosleep at night. If it’s been a busy day she makes up for her missed feeds in bed. We both wake for moments, latch and drift back to sleep.

2. The gymnastics
I mentioned this in my Six things crawling brought into our lives. Not only has Talitha taken to crawling away from me only to relaunch herself on my nipple but she gets into the strangest positions. She has tried breastfeeding upside down, facing away from me, hanging off my lap, and standing. I have never seen the like.
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Donor milk – would you use it?

Posted on March 26, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 31 Comments

Someone posted the sister advertisement to this one in one of the breastfeeding Facebook groups I’m a member of. The advert she posted asked: “What’s the best milk after Emma’s?” It featured an even younger baby than the one here. The baby in that photo was sitting up with her mother positioned to support her, should she wobble.

The World Health Organisation would answer the question in both adverts with: “donor milk”. So I’m tempted to Photoshop this ad to replace the SMA info at the bottom with: “Milk from another mother”.

This ad campaign annoys me on so many levels, from the obvious inaccuracy I’ve already mentioned to the numerous ways it flouts the International Code of Marketing of Breastmilk Substitutes. However, I’m not going to get into those right now.

(You can read more about it on the Baby Feeding Law Group if you like.)

What it made me think about again was whether I would use donor milk. The hierarchy of milks goes like this: mother’s milk, her expressed milk, another mother’s milk and, failing all of that, formula.

I knew that when I gave Talitha formula.
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Silent Sunday

Posted on March 25, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 16 Comments



The breastfeeding father

Posted on March 18, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 20 Comments

I’ve just had my first Mother’s Day and, funnily enough, it’s made me think about fathers.

Laurence Talitha bought me La Leche League membership. The LLL is an international charity for breastfeeding mothers and I’ve just begun going to its Bristol branch meetings.

The card they presented me with on Sunday read: “Thank you for breastfeeding me.” Well, baby, I wouldn’t be doing it without your daddy.

It got me thinking that breastfeeding can and should be a shared experience. In our context, the person I share it with is my husband.

There’s so much talk these days about the pressure on women to breastfeed. I think the feeling of being pressured (and I could get into a whole post on why I believe there’s a lot of pressure on women to formula feed) stems from the increasing isolation experienced by women in Britain. So many of us are bearing the responsibility of breastfeeding on our own.

I’ve been thinking a bit about what has made things different for us. We’re a family that has faced ongoing breastfeeding difficulty from the initial tongue-tie to the persistent low milk supply.

Yet I can genuinely say I’ve never been alone on this journey. That knowledge is what has kept me going.

My first ever Mother's Day card

Along the way we’ve learned a lot about how fathers can get involved in breastfeeding. I’ll share mine and you can add yours:
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“Hooray for boobies”

Posted on February 19, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 13 Comments

Knowing that I’m the kind of woman who is a bit obsessed likes to talk about breasts, Carolin over at Mummy Alarm tagged me in her breastfeeding meme “Hooray for boobies”. Ok, my loverrr, I’m well up for it. Let the boob chat begin.

1. Why did you choose boob over bottle?

Before I got pregnant I wasn’t too bothered about the breastfeeding thing. Maybe I would, maybe I wouldn’t. I was pretty blasé in admitting this, which especially horrified a friend who was trying to convince his wife that she should give breastfeeding a go (she’s ended up breastfeeding quite successfully, actually, despite both of us having misgivings).

From the moment I found out I was pregnant, though, I knew I would try to breastfeed. It was the natural extension of pregnancy. My body would continue to nourish and protect my baby. The more I read about breastfeeding and about formula, the more convinced I was that I would feed her as biology intended.

2. How long did you breastfeed or are you planning to breastfeed?

I used to say until she’s at least two years’ old or whenever she self-weans. I now approach this question with caution. In light of all the difficulty we’ve had, I’m grateful to still be breastfeeding my eight-month-old. I really hope we can make it to a year but if not, I feel relieved and satisfied about having got here. If she hits three and I’m still breastfeeding her, you’ll know it’s because I worked too damn hard to give it up! That sounds so tiring though…

3. What is the best thing about breastfeeding?

Breastfeeding is powerful. I’m reading The Politics of Breastfeeding – When Breasts are Bad for Business at the moment and what’s hit me in its introduction is the power my body possesses in being designed to sustain another human life.
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Love’s new language

Posted on February 14, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding, Our life is a Circus | 7 Comments

Last week I had to write down a series of “feeling” words which described my breastfeeding experience. They were for a course I’m taking to become a breastfeeding peer supporter. As I wrote them down, I realised that their scope reached well beyond this single aspect of the last few months.

Each word on its own seems either negative or positive, something to empathise or rejoice with. Together, they become something altogether different. I haven’t journeyed from one end of this list to another.

I feel almost all these emotions every day. Sometimes I experience many of them at the same time and cannot really differentiate between them.
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The GP who “got” breastfeeding

Posted on February 7, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 19 Comments

I met a GP last week who “got” breastfeeding. Even if the guy hadn’t prescribed the Domperidone I needed to breastfeed my daughter without supplementing with formula, he was the first medical practitioner I’ve seen who has really understood the importance of breastfeeding on both a medical and emotional level.

I’d become disillusioned with medics over the last eight months. Most displayed a shocking lack of support in the face of our breastfeeding difficulty.

Maybe they too had begun to believe the NHS “Breast is best” hype which effectively translates: “Breast is ideal but bottle is the norm. Suggesting bottle feeding is easier than actually addressing your breastfeeding problems so just supplement already.”

Where there was empathy, the line was usually: “Let’s just wait and see.” It was well-meaning. It was intended to encourage me to keep breastfeeding. But for me, that would have amounted to: “Let’s just wait until your milk supply is so severely compromised, there is no chance of recovery.” Milk supply is time-sensitive. Real breastfeeding problems do not right themselves without adequate support.

Where there was trouble shooting, I was told to eat butter. Is that Yeo Valley’s secret? Do their cows subsist on animal fat? How is it that my placenta managed to feed my baby regardless of what I ate but my breasts required a certain (frankly, unhealthy) diet? Had my body somehow forgotten the art of nourishment at some point in labour?


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Taking it one breastfeed at a time

Posted on January 24, 2012 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding | 15 Comments

Before Talitha was born, I figured I’d be breastfeeding for at least two years or until whenever she self-weaned. If anyone asked, I’d always tag on “if I can” because I didn’t want to sound like I was getting ahead of myself.

That’s all it was though – a tag. I secretly assumed that if I tried hard enough, I could make breastfeeding happen.

So, when I ran into problems with my milk supply due to a tongue-tie diagnosed late in the game, I was seriously thrown. Determined not to give up, I dived into a stressful routine of pumping, breast compressions, frequent feeding, using a supplementary nursing system and taking Domperidone.

In exhaustion, I accepted that I would never have a full breast milk supply and started topping up every feed with a bottle.

Then, suddenly, my daughter began feeding more efficiently and the Domperidone kicked in. She was gaining too quickly. I dropped the formula right away and she continued to gain normally.

Finally, we’d reached a point where feeding felt natural, even enjoyable – everything people had told me it could be.
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Guest post: “Breastfeeding through postnatal depression”

Posted on December 9, 2011 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding, Guest posts | 4 Comments

Ella from Purple Mum is mother to three children and has had to deal with Postnatal Depression after each of their births. The illness has impacted her breastfeeding experience differently each time. She’s currently battling through and blogging about PND for the third time but generously took the time to share a thing or two about breastfeeding through it.

I have experienced postnatal depression following the birth of all three of my babies. During treatment for my illness it has been necessary for me to receive inpatient treatment. During this treatment I have met many mothers who have stopped breastfeeding either due to their illness or to medication choice Read more

What’s the best bottle for a breastfed baby?

Posted on December 7, 2011 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding, What I learned | Leave a comment

Back when I’d started supplementing Talitha’s feeds, first with expressed breast milk then with formula as well, I was hesitant about introducing a bottle.

But because I was expressing like mad, holding a baby who wouldn’t be put down and frankly needed something to not be such hard work, the bottle came in.

I tweeted, asking around for the best bottle for a breastfed baby and a few people gave some good suggestions. There’s nothing like experience to give you an idea on these things though.

So here’s my rundown on all the bottles we tried, should you find yourself in a similar position. Or not – choosing a good bottle is obviously important for bottle fed babies too!

If you’re a bottle connoisseur yourself, please share your views either on these bottles or others you’ve tried.


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Taking drugs to keep breastfeeding

Posted on December 6, 2011 by Adele Jarrett-Kerr Posted in Breastfeeding, Our life is a Circus | 18 Comments

Most breastfeeding mothers can afford to be vague about when they’re going to stop breastfeeding.

Their decision may depend on cultural expectations (“She’s walking and talking and you are still nursing her?!”) or personal comfort (“I just can’t deal with the biting anymore!”) or parenting philosophy (“He’ll wean when he’s ready.”)

But there are others, like me, who need to take a more pragmatic approach. The question of how long we’ll breastfeed goes hand in hand with another question: how long can we afford to take domperidone?


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